It’s a date: Kiwi influence Ellie Haines on the ugly lengths she goes to

Welcome to the first season of the Herald’s dating podcast: It’s A Date. Join Herald dating columnist Lillie Rohan as she takes Kiwi standouts on a fantastic date, learning about their relationships and love lives along the way.

Loving Ellie’s Belly – aka. Ellie Haines – it’s all about sharing the love.

For her body, mind, friends and family she likes to encourage others to do the same, but the New Zealand social media star reveals it’s a mission not everyone is on board with.

“I think people come to my page and immediately assume things about me that aren’t so true and just don’t see who I really am as a person.”

She originally started her social media journey as Losing Ellie’s Belly and documented her weight loss, but her brand has since changed and grown from strength to strength. First rebranding as a self-love page and now with her husband, they run their business Abeille Candles, which has its own popular Instagram page.

The two Instagram pages have more than 100,000 followers combined, and while it’s an accomplishment she’s immensely proud of, Haines reveals it comes with its challenges.

Taking It’s A Date podcast host Lillie Rohan to New York, Haines recounts how her recent business venture saw her and her husband receive unprovoked hate, including an email saying “your wife is crazy fat” and says to share how they handle those nasty messages as a couple.

Is online hate affecting your relationship?

Haines says her husband Brett hates social media, “it’s extremely private,” she says, so when the two started their business and decided to share behind-the-scenes snippets as a way to build a relationship with customers them, he began to be attracted. “in a lot of the negative things that can happen on social media.”

The couple have been together for five years and married in February, with Haines saying their relationship has always been easy, which is why it’s no different when it comes to dealing with people sharing their opinions about it online.

“You get trolls and stuff, but the positives outweigh that and the real awesome community we’ve created there, they’re an awesome bunch of people. So I have to keep reminding myself that I have a cool online family and that’s all that matters.”

What is a green flag to you?

“I think a green flag for me is how they talk about their family and past relationships,” Haines says. “Of course we’ve all had bad relationships, but depending on how they talk about an ex, I think it can show who they are as a person in a very different way and how they talk about their family.”

But she says there is one major green flag that stands out for her.

“I love a man who loves his mother and respects his mother. To me, that’s the biggest green flag ever, and it’s so sexy.”

What moment from your wedding day would you recreate?

Haines has been open with her followers about her wedding, sharing tons of beautiful photos from the day and even discussing how her and her husband’s different faiths played a role in how they approached the ceremony.

But like anyone who has experienced such a magical day, there’s always a moment you can’t help but look back on with utter love and wish you could relive it.

To find out which moment Haines would relive, listen to the full It’s A Date podcast at iHeartRadio, Apple Podcasts, Spotifyor wherever you get your podcasts.